Joke Shop
by Chocolate Frogs
Summary: Fred and George after Hogwarts.


Author's Note:Of course, all characters belong to the wonderful J.K.R. Only the plot is mine.

**Chapter One**

Graduation for Fred and George

  


**I**t was a warm and muggy morning just into the beginning of June.There were just four more days until the students would have to board the Hogwarts Express and start on the ride home.The exam results hadn't been posted yet, but were sure to be at any moment.Most of the children where taking advantage of there last few moments of worry-free-time before the results where posted, by spending it outside in the warm air.They didn't yet have to worry about what their parents would say when they only got 45 on the Potions exam.

Next to the lake, a large group had formed (including Harry, Ron, and Hermione) around four people: Fred and George Weasley, their friend Lee Jordan, and a talkative Hufflepuff first year, Kio Levin, which no one but his friends paid any attention too whatsoever.He was short and skinny, with messy brown hair, and small cloudy gray eyes; but to Fred and George, looked just like every other first year.A victim.

"It tastes exactly like chocolate éclair," Fred said to Kio, holding out a chocolate colored candy, in the shape of a small fish.Kio looked at it suspiciously, and licked his lips.He loved chocolate éclair.He had never had it at all before the feast right after the sorting and hadn't had very much of it since, but gotten his hands on as much as he could.He had even paid a fourth year five galleons just for a small box of it when she went to Hogsmeade. He wanted so it much but wasn't sure if he should believe the three boys.The two that were identical had identical looks of honesty on their faces, but everyone else seemed to be sniggering a little too much.And their friend, Lee Jordan, seemed to have a grin plastered to his face.

"We swear it does.Honest!"George told Kio seeing the doubtful look on his face."Look, I'll even try one," George offered, picking up a fish from the corner of the box that looked just a little lighter than the others to Harry.He whispered this to Ron and Hermione, but before they could get a good look at the sweet, George popped it into his mouth, chewed, swallowed and made a "yum-my!" noise, rubbing his stomach, smiling.

This was just too much for Kio; he quickly grabbed the four-centimeter long light brown fish shaped candy out of George's out stretched hand, and shoved it into his mouth, swallowing rather loudly.The crowd gasped, and leaned forward, awaiting the side affect from the twins' tasty treat.Nothing seemed to be happening.Kio, seeing the excited look on everyone's face, now knew it was a trick, and didn't say anything, also waiting for something terrible to happen to him.When after two minutes still nothing had happened, he sighed relieved. 

"Golly I'm glad that nothing happened to me.When I saw the looks on every ones faces I knew for sure that is had to be a trick.I was so scared that I was going to explode or something, but I'm glad that it was just an ordinary piece of candy.But you know boys; it doesn't really taste like chocolate éclair very much.Maybe just a little, but only a little bit, not 'nough to be called chocolate éclair or nothin'.It does taste good though.I like it a lot.You think that I could maybe buy a box or two from you, I would fancy eating them on the train ride home.Maybe I'll buy one for my mum too.Gosh, she'd like 'em a ton.She likes every kind of sweet, and her weight shows it too.She favors fudge, but I 'spect that she'd be happy 'nough with some of this, though.Why are you all looking at me like that?Is it really expensive or something like that?"

Sure enough, everyone was gaping at Kio.Fred and George where looking especially happy."Told ya that it would work, Lee," Fred said smirking at Lee, who stood wide-eyed with everyone else."Yeah, now where are our ten galleons?" George asked, hand out stretched in Lee's direction.Lee reached into one of his robe's many pockets, and pulled out a leather bag.He picked ten galleons out of his bag and gave five to each twin, who put their coins into a similar pouch and then into George's pocket. 

"What was the bet?" asked Kio getting scared.What had just happened that had made Fred and George win the bet?What had happened to him?He looked down at his feet and was relieved to see feet there, not fins or hooves.His arms where still arms.He didn't have a single feather.Looking way up at the three boys, he suddenly knew what was wrong.Everyone seemed huge.He had shrunk!

"What have you done to me?"Hollered Kio, but didn't say anything else.When he had talked, he had shrunk just a little bit more!Horrified he started to run for the hospital wing, but realizing that it would take hours to get there he stopped dead in his tracks, and sat down on the grass, which even though it had just been trimmed short came up to his shoulders. 

"Brilliant, utterly brilliant!" Lee Jordan told the twins once he was done being surprised."What do you call them?"

"It's a great name, it took us all of last night to come up with.We were going to call them some stupid name, which I am too embarrassed to even say aloud.But while we were sleeping last night, at around three, I woke up and had the best name ever!"George replied excitedly.

"Shrinking Sardines!Great, isn't it?" Fred asked Jordan.

"Oh yeah, that isn't at _all stupid!" smirked Malfoy who had just joined the group along with his bodyguard friends Crabbe and Goyle. _

Ron had just turned around and was surely going to say something rude to Malfoy and get beat up, when Ginny ran to join the crowd, panting. "The exam scores have been posted, and I passed every class! I thought that my fourth year would be harder the way you guys talked about it last year!"Ginny said to Ron, Harry, and Hermione.

"I never said it was hard!And neither did Harry!You must be talking about Ron," Hermione said.Harry knew that she must be mad at Ron for something, because Harry _had_ said something about how hard the exams where last year, but he didn't want to get Hermione mad at him too, so he said nothing.

"Did you look and see how many N.E.W.T.S I got Ginny?" George asked his little sister ruffling her hair.

"No, I didn't look, why would I?But Harry got heaps of O.W.L.S." Ginny said, smiling at Harry.

"So what you're telling me is, you didn't slash couldn't even glance at my score, which is just above yours, but you can go searching through everyone else's names, looking for Harry's?And Potter isn't exactly right next to Weasley now is it?" George said, trying to look angry, but not doing a very good job. 

Ginny blushed a deep violet and stuttered, "Well, I… and you… well you see… I thought…"

"Don't worry Ginny," Fred told her, patting her on the back a little harder than was necessary, making the skinny girl stumble slightly."We _all_ know that you _like_ Harry."

It had seemed as though Ginny couldn't get any redder, but she did.And Harry felt himself getting pink in the cheeks as well."Shut it Fred," Harry said pushing Fred just a little.

"What, you want a fight, Potter?" George said sneering and looking terribly like Malfoy, only with flaming red hair instead of light blond.

Harry was surprised to see the twins looking truly angry, and backed away from them a step."Sorry, didn't know that you were so touchy!" Harry muttered.

In an instant Fred and George's sneer's turned to smiles and George said, "Don't worry, we were just messing with your head.You looked like we had just turned into a werewolf or something."

"No, worse.You looked just like Malfoy," Harry whispered under his breath so only they could hear him.The twins smiled and said, "We wanted to look stupid and the best way to do that is to act like Malfoy, glad to hear that we did a good job.We are getting better at this acting thing, don't you think?"

"Yeah.Well, let's go look and see the results.I can't exactly imagine getting 'heaps' of O.W.L.S.Especially since Snape tries to fail me every chance that he gets."

As most of the group started to walk back towards to school, a few of Kio's friends could be seen crawling around on their hands and knees searching for their tiny friend.The only problem being that they were afraid that they might squash him.They didn't even end up finding him for an hour.When they did, he was rushed to Madam Pomfrey.

When Harry had finally pushed his way though the crowd to look at his exam results ten minutes later, he was disappointed to see that "heaps" in Ginny's head weren't as many as he had hoped for.

Hermione however was happy as ever.The lowest grade she got was a 98 in Potions and that was 17 points lower than her next lowest grade in Herbology.Ron had managed well enough, but surely not as well as his mum would have liked, which meant long days at the Weasley house for at least a little while.

Fred and George had gotten surprisingly good marks.Which seemed impossible.How had they managed to scrape though every single class (with good grades) when they were always up to something that they shouldn't be?Perhaps setting off dungbombs in the Potions room helped them in some weird way.Maybe making all the Slytherin brooms fly only when the rider was seated backwards, and then only vertically had helped them in… Potions?Whatever the way they had done it they had somehow manage to get more detentions in the whole record of the school and still only get seven marks less than Percy in N.E.W.T.S.These boys were heroes.However they did it, everyone was proud of them, and wished that they had had as much fun and yet got such grades.

Harry looked over to where Malfoy was standing and saw his eyes widen in astonishment and mutter under his breath, "Oh man, Father's going to kill me.Good thing I go such a good mark in Potions."This made Harry feel much better.Malfoy must have really bad grades to be worrying about what his father (who adored Malfoy and hated almost everyone else) would do.Harry rushed over to Ron and Hermione and said excited, "I think that Malfoy got some really bad marks.He was saying how his dad is going to kill him. Isn't that just great?"

"'Bout time that Malfoy gets in trouble from his stupid dad.What a git.Both of them!" Ron nearly shouted, causing a few people to look in their direction, looks of annoyance on their faces.

"I guess that's good.But I think that it is mean to find pleasure in someone else's problems," Hermione sighed.

"Hermione, what are you nuts?" Ron shouted again causing even more people to stare.

"Yeah Hermione, this is _Malfoy_ we're talking about, 'member?" Harry said a little distressed that Hermione didn't share their pleasure of seeing Malfoy in distress.

Hermione shook her head and said, "Oh yes of course.But Dra… Malfoy is still a person too, just like everyone else."

"You where going to call him Draco, weren't you Hermione?" questioned Harry.

"You can't call him Draco Hermione.It's against the rules." Hermione looked confused."Hermione, you must understand.Malfoy is our _enemy_.(As is opposite of _friend_) If he started calling us by our first names… then we would still call him Malfoy.You only call your friends by their first names.Unless you… You have a crush on him?"

Ron had hoped that Hermione would blush to prove that she did like Malfoy; it would be fun to tease her about it.But she didn't and that meant that she didn't like him.Ron thought sometimes that Hermione didn't like anyone.Not in that way at least.Hermione simply said, "Don't be silly Ron, just because I said he is a person, that doesn't mean he is a niceperson.Now I am going to go to the library if you want to come…"

"Why?" Harry asked.

"Hermione, there isn't any work left to do.Why in the world are you going to the library for?" Ron asked clearly puzzled.

"I have to… Well if you must know, I am going to do research on… Where Viktor is from.I'm going to go visit him again this summer, and I want to know more about the land and history and stuff before I go.And at Hogwarts you can find out about anything and everything.You guys want to come along?"

"Well..." Ron started.

Harry interrupted, "We'd love to Hermione.Not like we have anything else to do anyway."He shot a stern glance in Ron's direction and started after Hermione to the library. Hermione had never told them where he really lived and he hoped that this would be the day that they would find out.

But, as luck would have it, Hermione was very secretive about her information finding.Harry was hoping that she might slip and start bragging in some way about finding some really neat information about wherever Viktor was from, but nothing slipped.Nothing that either Harry or Ron caught anyway.

So they left Hermione in the library after having been in there for nearly two hours.

****

Finally the last day of the school year came, for some gladly, but Harry, as always, wasn't looking forward to it at all.But Fred and George had all sorts of crazy plans and job ideas that they would to until they made enough money to start their own joke shop.The only thing that Harry had to look forward to was when he went to go visit the Weasley Family at the end of summer break.In the afternoon they would board the famous Hogwarts Express and ride to London.Harry almost hoped that the Dursley's wouldn't show up to pick him up, and then maybe he could go home with Ron.He didn't really expect that to happen, but he could dream couldn't he?

Late that night Fred and George threw the biggest party Griffindor had ever known.It bigger than when Griffindor won their first game, and even bigger than when they one the house cup.It was just a little better than when Griffindor one the Quidditch Cup in Harry's third year.People would remember it for years.Fred and George said that they needed to leave everyone something to remember them by, and a huge party seemed like the best, most fun way to have everyone remember them.Of course they said it wasn't just for their leaving but also Katie, Angelina, and Alicia's.But no one thought of it as anyone but Fred and George's.There were at least twenty people turned into four-foot dragons before the word got around not to eat the cranberry pie.No one dared to touch the small chocolate fish, which turned out to be just that, small chocolate fish.But many people were seen with brightly colored hair from the candy that looked exactly like Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans, called Gred Weasley's Every Color Beans. There could even be seen two or three four-foot dragon's with bright pink hair.

It lasted all night and near all morning.No one even thought of going to bed until nearly four A.M.The last ones up where of course Fred and George themselves, who went to sleep at 6:30, but not in their beds.

They were found at near noon when the first Griffindors to awake decided that breakfast or lunch really would be a good idea, even though they were still filled up on all the treats Fred and George had gotten from the kitchen.By chance the first Griffindors to awake where, Angelina, Katie, and Alicia.Now, these three girls had had many pranks played on them by these two mischievous boys, and thought they would like to repay them.Luckily there were still some of the boys joke food laying around and the girls stuffed it into Fred and George's open mouths.But, instead of chewing and swallowing the treats, both boys started choking on them.The girls went frantic and started screaming, but not very loudly, not really wanting to wake anyone up.

"Oh no!We just killed Fred and George!"Katie cried out, near to hysterics.

"Don't be silly," said Angelina said, trying to remain calm."You can't choke when you're dead."

"But…but you can choke until you die!"Alicia muttered. She was not quite as calm as Angelina, but surely not going into hysterics like Katie.

"They will be fine.They… I'm sure it's nothing all that serious," Angelina said looking like it would be a _relief _to go into hysterics, but at the same time looking as if she wanted to kill Katie for acting up in such a way.

The girls shook the twins, trying to wake them up, but it seemed like an impossible task.Would they ever wake up?How could they still be sleeping when they were near to coughing up their meal from last night?

Then, as suddenly as they had started, they boys stopped coughing, and turned into sleeping four-foot dragons with bright green and purple poked dots and florescent yellow hair.The girls looked at each other and burst into laughter and ran to the portrait and left for lunch.

When Fred and George woke up an hour later, a group had formed around them, and were all laughing and pointing.Fred looked at George and burst into laughter, fire coming out of his mouth.Everyone in the room scattered.George joined into the fire breathing laughter and before long the had started fire to half of the common room.Luckily Hermione was still level headed and started a raining charm, putting out all of the flames, including Fred and George's.


End file.
